WHY FRIENDSHIP ?

It’s not a friendship day per say. But today I will delve on friendship and its’ profound and complex effect on our lives.

Like any other relationship, friendship also has its bright and dark sides.

Today, however, let me take only the bright side!!

Did you think about someone when you read this Nigerian quote on friend given alongside? 

This question is for everyone and age is no bar. I am sure your answer is yes! 

If not, then it’s high time for you to find a true friend since I am going to tell you about the social, psychological and physiological benefits of having a good friendship.

Parents introduce toddlers to outside world which is mainly comprised of people like them, viz. other toddlers. They are asked and sometimes pushed to play and share. Some of them do it willingly and excitedly but some take time. It does not matter how much time a child takes to mingle and play happily with other children, but s/he learns the very first lesson that if s/he wants to play with other children s/he has to “share.”

Researchers have found that half of the children who are referred for emotional and behavioral problems have no friends or face difficulty in peer interactions.

As children grow they start learning new skills. Friendship gives them the platform to practice those skills. Observe children playing, you can see them giving constructive feedback, encouragement and most of the times practical demonstrations to each other.

Friendship plays a very crucial role during preteen and teen age. At this time most of the children start cutting off from their families and try to create their own independence and identity. It’s a very important phase of life and very complex too. In this stage of life, children look for someone outside their families, especially a friend/s for their emotional needs. They share their feelings and thoughts with one another and in this process learn to develop trusting and affectionate relationships. They learn to empathize, care and support one another.

When the entire world, sometimes including the parents of the teenagers, see them confused, rebellious or weird, friends give each other unconditional regard and acceptance. They learn to forgive and forget and most importantly to say sorry if they realize they have hurt their friend/s.

People think that they do not need friends when they grow up. However, we need friends in every age. Within your friends circle, you can be you. Friendship gives you a space to reconnect with yourself. In that space you are not someone’s partner, parent or employee; you are you. At this stage of life friends inspire each other to achieve their goals, resolve each other’s issues and conflicts, comfort each other in their testing times and keep each other’s secrets which they cannot share with their respective families. You can think of friendship as “Freud Couch” where you can have the cathartic release of your emotions!

It’s been observed in studies that people who have strong friendship bonds and have good support system have better pain tolerance and a stronger immune system. Friendship seems to reduce their risk of developing feelings of loneliness, helplessness and depression.

Friendship practically works as a healer. So, today talk to at least one of your friends!

Remember to “Hold on to a true friend with both hands.” If you don’t you will lose a confider, admirer, supporter, critic, adviser, mediator, and most importantly a counselor !