Revisiting Relationships........

Today is a special day for many couples; married, going to get married soon and those in committed relationship.

Today so many women have observed fast for the safety and long life of their partners. Their colorful bright dresses and their excitement has given a special touch to the festival season.

I think today is the day to talk about relationships.

I agree that not all couples are happy couples and not all women observe this ritual at their will.

But I think today most couples focus on their relationship. Some take this opportunity to strengthen their bond with each other, some to revive and rediscover their love for each other, some to reconsider and reconnect in a more meaningful way.Some others, I think, might have a desire to do all that to keep their relationships intact!!                                                                                                      

Here are two important suggestions/advice for that -

John M. Gottman, a renowned marriage therapist, identified four behaviors which can damage a loving relationship. 

He compared these with “The Four Horsemen of Apocalypse (destruction)” mentioned in the last book of ‘New Testament.’

These behavior are-

• Criticism.
• Defensiveness.
• Contempt &
• Stonewalling.

First Advice-

Be aware of these four behaviors and stay away from them as much as possible.

But in case you have expressed any of these behaviors then do something to repair the damage to save your relationship.

Gottman also mentioned four behaviors which repair and strengthen the relationship.

These behavior are-

Interest. 

Humor. 

Affection  & 

Engaged Listening.

Second Advice-

Make conscious effort to openly express and engage in these repairing behaviors as much as possible.

This is all for today!!

Wish you all a very fulfilling relationship!!

Some helpful tips for people dealing with loss and grief .

Counseling & Psychotherapy Services.

"In search of self"................

Continued..............

‘Turning Points’ .....................

I am sure you must have recalled and recollected many turning points from your life. Each turning point must have its own story. You must have experienced varied emotions while thinking about each story.

Were you able to realize how those experiences and emotions impacted you and your views about others and the world? I am sure there must have been both positive and negative impacts.

Do you want to change something?

But you cannot do that? Those stories have already been written. You cannot rewrite any of their chapters.

But what you can do is, you can write a new story by making a decision of ‘letting go’ of the emotions which are still negatively impacting you.

Can you do that?